jordan writes about stuff. that's the gist. she originally hoped her biography would indicate she was once a talking head on vh1's "i love the 2000's" but that ship has sailed, so she will settle for writing about things like that here. she has these Harley boots that everyone has an opinion on. she has a high tolerance for coffee and peppermints. her football team (the NINERS) sucks, but her fantasy team doesn't. she has an unhealthy obsession with mary-kate olsen. her mid-life crisis came early and she's handling it rather well. she says fuck a lot. not drinking has brought her clarity but she has less stupid stories, i suppose that's the trade-off. more than likely, at some point, somewhere, she's judging you by your music choices. she maintains the theory that it's a big deal if more than one person has a spotify playlist about you and she hopes that she is a big deal. she's super good at being vague, as this 'about me' reflects.