and it hits you

11:17 PM

Seriously out of nowhere like a ton of bricks, if you'll excuse the metaphor. You can't prepare for that. And you didn't even expect to feel anything. And then you did feel everything. Every emotion you could possibly feel in a single moment which is enough to cause your heart to clench and your mind to race and then before you know it, the salt stings and the tips of your fingers are covered in moisture to hide the fact that you had a moment.

And no one judged you, or cared, or minded. They're supportive and loving and agree that you're going to be fine and have a great life. You know all of this is true but impatience stops you and you just feel like a shot of anything would do the trick right now.

And it makes you angry.

Sorry, dear, but this is part of the process. And don't worry, it'll happen again, but this time you may not be able to conceal your feelings. You may have to lose it on someone or scream in your car or delicately place your fist through a door. You probably will not be prepared next time either, but at least this time you'll have a little more experience on what you can expect when you realize that all of this is absolutely fucking golden.

Look how low I've sunk, don't ask me to rise.

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sup fool.

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